Osama To Die . . . Again
Remember the M*A*S*H
episode where General "Iron Guts" Kelly unceremoniously dies in bed with Hot Lips Houlihan? Though the general was dead, his loyal aide was determined to rewrite history so that world would believe Iron Guts died a death befitting a warrior. The aide makes arrangements to have the general's body dumped at a fierce battlefront and, sure enough, the press reports that ol' Iron Guts Kelly gloriously died battling the enemy.
Evidently, al-Qaeda thugs watch M*A*S*H reruns.
CBS News reports that another audiotape message purportedly from Osama bin Laden has been received by an "Islamic news agency". On the tape, the person representing himself as bin Laden says, "Surely this year I will lead my steed and hurl it, and my soul, at one of the targets ... and I become a martyr."
Why is it that after all this time, "Osama" is predicting his death? Why didn't he schedule his martyrdom for 2002? The answer is obvious: because he's already dead. Osama died in an unceremonious, Iron Guts Kelly fashion—hiding in a Afghanistan cave in late 2001. That's certainly not a martyrdom worthy of a supposedly fearless leader of an Islamic jihad, is it?
