NOBEL WEENIES SIDE WITH SADDAM: The Norweigan Nobel Committee demonstrated its support of Saddam's regime by giving Jimmy "No Olympics for You!" Carter a Peace Prize for smooching the ass of nearly every enemy of the United States.
The NoBalls — oops — Nobels stated the reasons for Carter's award in a more fluffy fashion; they said he deserves the prize "for his decades of untiring effort to find peaceful solutions to international conflicts, to advance democracy and human rights, and to promote economic and social development." How Carter's record of brazenly seeking to appease and preserve the world's most tyrannical regimes translates into advancing democracy and human rights is a mystery.
In reality, the Nobels' intent was not to honor Carter but to criticize President Bush's Iraqi policy. They chose Carter for one reason: his high-profile opposition to President Bush's plans to defend America and the rest of the civilized world against Saddam Hussein. And the Nobel Committee even admits it! Gunnar Berge, the head doofus of the Nobel Committee, is quoted by
Reuters as remarking that "with the position Carter has taken...(the award) can and must also be seen as criticism of the line the current U.S. administration has taken on Iraq." Reuters also reports that when "asked if the award might help dampen the chance of unilateral U.S. attacks on Iraq, Berge said: 'Hopefully, hopefully.'"
Berge's hopes are misplaced; a Nobel Prize affects U.S. foreign policy about as much as a Publishers Clearing House prize. Regardless, the Nobel Prize Patrol will soon arrive at Jimmy Carter's front door with a giant million-dollar novelty check as a reward for his efforts to lull Americans into forgetting that he was a shitty-beyond-belief president.
